I feel like I have just been plunged into a vat of sickly goo.
Yes, I suppose some might argue that Ek Deewana Tha is the most romantic movie of the year so far.
Mrs W and I, hard hearts that we are, agreed it was the soppiest.
What it does is highlight the remarkable rise to fame in the sub-continent of former Miss England runner-up Amy Jackson.
I really don't know what Jackson's qualifications for starring in a Bollywood film are other than being very pretty.
She was born in the Isle of Man and her dad is a BBC Radio Merseyside presenter.
In Ek Deewana Tha they get around her accent by saying that she is from Kerala and, therefore, speaks Hindi with a Malayalam twang. I'd have to bow down to the superior knowledge of those who know.
Jackson plays Jessie, a well to do lass who makes her next-door neighbour Sachin (Prateik) go all weak at the knees on first sight.
The film then becomes Sachin's chase to marry Jessie despite a multitude of hurdles, in particular, her disapproving father.
The thing is that while some might consider Prateik dashing and romantic, he comes across, in my opinion, as whiny in his protestations of love.
Indeed, I couldn't quite work out how he keeps a job such is the amount of time he spends pursuing (stalking?) Jessie.
And that is pretty much it for over two hours. Mrs W made the point that she was quite taken with the will they/won't they saga to start with but it started to wear after and hours and then drifted into full time snoredom by two hours.
Meanwhile, it did get me wondering whether there is a single father in India who approves of his daughter's choice of partner. I can't recall one in any film I've seen.
And they are always so melodramatic aren't they?
Ek Deewana Tha is a pretty film. Its characters, while particularly shallow, are eye candy while the backdrops prove there has been a keen eye on cinematography.
But this can't deflect from the fact that it was pretty tedious.
Laughs: One decent one
Jumps: none
Vomit: none
Nudity: Obviously not...I thought Amy Jackson would faint at the mere mention of puckering up.
Overall rating: 4/10
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